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Scientists say, dog owners shoud not fart.

New studies carried out at the University of Westminster, London, shows that dogs hate people who fart; in fact they get so furious they could tear you apart, if you do that.

According to reports, whiles carrying out the experiment , fifty human lives were lost , because the dogs could not be restrained by security officers . This fifty people were among the three hundred that had volunteered to be part of the experiment because they felt they were well vexed in the art of fart.

One of the now diseased, Kimberly, a fresher in high school, was reported to have said , “My parents used to fight a lot when i was younger. They would fight over everything , but unfortunate for them one day i mistakenly farted in my room whiles they were fighting downstairs. The smell and power of it travelled throughout the whole house , and my parents immediately stopped fighting. They just felt weak and blind and stuff.  Since that day, they don’t fight anymore because they know i know what I can do”

Kimberly was the first to be ripped apart : three dogs immediately pounced on here when at the command of scientists she released her lethal gas.

A farmer by the name Peter Drucker was the next to be killed , then Spencer Beef-Turkey , a local bar owner.

After the fifty lives were lost, scientists decided to use monkeys so to avoid another incident; after all they paid the volunteers only 50 pounds each.

Shown in the video is the first monkey that was used . The dog used in this particular experiment was kept behind a glass so he could not get to the monkey.

The dog was so furious but he could not get to the monkey. Reminds you of when your younger sibling would piss you off but then if you beat them your parents will beat you too , so you just feel trapped and helpless.

You just watch as they tease you to death.

As a result of this research , scientist have also discovered that monkeys generally have more fart power than humans.

Scientists also believe that in the near future, we could use monkey fart in place of the traditional fuel we use in vehicles, today.

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Comedy

Patapaa’s primary school teacher found.

So since, the 24th of January 2019, there has being a question trending online; a question so philosophical it demands the indulgence of the entire Ghanaian public; intellectuals, scientists, market women, everyone.

Yesterday, one of the names to mention when you speak of Ghanaian comedy, DKB, on his twitter said, “Sarkodie’s primary school teacher was Grammy nominated Rocky Dawuni wow! No wonder Sark has been chasing Grammy.

Now my question is, who was Patapaa’s primary school teacher?”

Who was Patapaa’s primary school teacher?

Since yesterday there are now officially eight wonders of the world – the world wonders who this “primary teacher” could be. Also, scientists have abandoned their current research into explaining why some people like their own posts. They invested a lot into that research, but nevertheless according to reports, they have agreed that finding the primary school teacher of Patapaa is of much greater importance.

Sci-Fi movie lovers across the world also believe that if we can identify this teacher, we can send people back in time to assassinate them, and hence prevent the influence they had on young Patapaa.

Maybe it was this teacher that told Patapaa he could do anything he wanted to do in life.  Maybe Patapaa wanted to become an astronaut but this teacher discouraged him when in response to the question, “what is the ninth planet?”, young Patapaa said earth. If so, the teacher should have been more lenient.

Maybe Ghanaians need to be more lenient, on Patapaa. Why do we keep picking on him?

Well, he did walk out of an award show furious that he didn’t win no award. Thinks he deserves it.

Anyway who was Patapaa’s primary school teacher? Who do you think?  King Ayisoba? Appietus? Who could it be?

I mean we could mention King Ayisoba but that man really has put out some good music. “I want to see you my fadei. I want to see you my fadei …” – That was some pretty content filled music. King Ayisoba has a good voice and the international world really loves him.

We could mention Appietus obviously, because the few times we heard him on songs, he was saying nothing. In fact, it’s safe to say that Appietus invented mumble rap. He sure should have been one of Eminem’s diss tracks.

Anyway even though Appietus says nothing, just like Patapaa, as far as music production, Appietus wouldn’t produce songs like one corner. I’m somewhat sure.

Appietus is like the bad pastor who teaches his congregation to do what is good and righteous. He surely couldn’t have taught young Patapaa to do this in the future.

Frankly, it is hard to point out anyone who fits the criteria to have being Patapaa’s primary school teacher; except… except if it was Bukom Banku or Ayitey Powers. Maybe this is more of a Bukom Banku thing; you know nothing is impossible for that man.

So yeah, Bukom Banku was the primary school teacher of Patapaa. The bad english; the “rebel” mindset -definitely Bukom Banku.

In primary school, the statement, “Anything you want if you get, there is no beggars on the road.” inspired young Patapaa, and absolutely changed how he views life. Patapaa particularly idolized his teacher, Bukom Banku, for his insightful quotes.

Now we know where Patapaa gets his style from.

Anway who won’t be motivated to grow up and do a song like “one corner” if they had a teacher make profound statements like:  “A Tsetse fly cannot listen to their teaching, is walking to the death man to go cemetery” everyday in class.

Source : Isaac Asare (Psyche)

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